NO MORE
by Brenda Looney
How do you say good-bye to the one you've loved most dear?
There never is an easy way
to face the decision
without fear.
I held her close to me and prayed the Lord
would take her home
Her heart was pounding, her breathing
labored
I knew it would not be long.
I had never known such pain, such sorrow
I just knew
that it had to end
I had to help her cross over
"Hang on, my love, I'll help you my friend"
She cried and the time seemed endless
Till the doctor
came in to help.
I was wracked with guilt
For
putting this off
I hated this fate that she had been
dealt
I held her in my arms and said my last good-byes,
I
tried to be reassuring so that she would not cry.
I told her
that I loved her and that everything would be OK
I felt I
could not breathe
the time was gone
there was so
much more I wanted to say.
I wrapped her lifeless body in the blanket I had brought.
I held her close to me, my mind raced with thought.
I
remembered the day I brought her home
and how much joy we
shared.
All the faithfulness and unconditional love
and now for her to leave
I was totally unprepared.
No more, no more for me.
I can't do it.
My
heart is broken
I have cried my last tear.
Her
name will never again be spoken
There is no way I can go
through this again
Of this I am most certain.
In
my mind this was crystal clear.
My love was gone
I'd drawn the final curtain.
I'm not ever going to let someone again come into my heart.
I refuse to love and then be torn apart
I can't take
it.
It's too hard.
I must close the door and keep
up my guard
Time passed and there was not a day I did not remember
I stared at her picture and cried for what was no more.
I kept her ashes in the closet as I couldn't face
What
would separate her from me ...
To close that final door.
Months went by, and I knew it was time.
I prepared my
loved one's final resting place.
This final act of love I was
now prepared to face
I took her ashes in the urn and buried
them in the ground.
I planted forget-me-nots, violets and
bleeding hearts all around.
I made a little headstone and put
a statue there to grace
It was over.
It was
done
She was in her final resting place.
I still grieved for her and missed her more each day.
I
tried to live without her, but I couldn't find the way.
I
held fast my position that I could not go through this again.
But found myself, in a weak moment, yearning to have another
friend.
The paper would come and I'd go straight for the
ads.
My heart began to open and I didn't feel so sad.
One night it was there.....the perfect one for me.
It
was my new love ... my destiny.
I brought her home and it was late.
I tucked her into
bed with me.
She licked and snuggled and
I knew
that from my grief I was finally free
She melted the stone in
my heart of whence I'd said "No more"
I was in love again
In my heart I felt the opening of a door.
I know from somewhere beyond the Rainbow Bridge
Where
the grass is tall and there are beautiful flowers,
Runs my
old friend free from pain through lovely springtime showers.
Her tail is wagging
She's happy for she can see
That I'm not alone and grieving
I have a new
friend
And from the pain I'm free.
Memories of
an Abundant Life * Family Ties
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